Author: Melanie Cane, M.D.
Genre: Memoir, Standalone
Published: 2008
Personal Rating: 4/5
Yearly Count: 44
From the back cover:
In 1993, Jimmy Breslin wrote a front page story for New York Newsday, about Melanie Cane, a troubled young psychiatrist who "let love take her too far." Fifteen years later, melanie tells her side of the story in Poisoned Love, a heartbreaking and staggering account of her spiral into the depths of mental illness and what she did under the guise of love.With extraordinary courage, Melanie provides intimate access to the thoughts and feelings leading to her desperate act, as well as an unvarnished account of her subsequent psychiatric treatment and the legal and social consequences of her crime.
Melanie's steady progress toward recovery involves an emerging understanding of the relationship between her various diagnoses and her attachment to an abusive mentally ill father.
Her story teaches people about survival and success in the face of severe mental illness.
I was asked if I'd be interested in reading this memoir and found the topic to be interesting, so I accepted the offer. I was curious to find out what goes on in an individual's mind that could cause them to react in such a despicable manner. Melanie satisfied my curiosity by describing her inner turmoil with intimate accounts and raw emotions.
Melanie's story is one of survival and I can see how it may help people to understand the progression of mental illness; however, I felt it was incredibly repetitive. And, I didn't care for the mixture of patient and doctor as one person. She'd be relaying an event as a patient, then immediately explain it as a doctor the next. That was too close for me to trust her judgment. I would have preferred her psychiatrist to be the one to help the reader understand.
There was an accomplice in Melanie's scheme and my one nagging question is why didn't she implicate him in a stronger manner? I realize that she needed to focus on herself, but doing that doesn't exclude his involvement and the pain he encouraged. Also, I understand that bringing him down, doesn't bring her up; however, again - he was an accomplice. She has learned from the experience, but has he? Maybe the possibility of his career being in jeopardy scared him straight, but that just doesn't seem right to me - he was essentially let off scot-free.
I have read many memoirs about people that have had many bad things happen to them, and I don't recall every feeling the way I do now. I'm glad that she has persisted in seeking treatment and has pursued a life of doing the right thing (being aware of her feelings and acting appropriately), but there's a 'poor, poor me' aura that hovers over the book. Maybe it's her brutal honesty or candid accounts of her actions, but I never had much sympathy for her. Maybe she doesn't want it, so all is well - I don't know. What I do know is that I wish her the best.
Poisoned Love did turn out to be an interesting read, as I had hoped. Different aspects of the book earned varying ratings, but my final rating has been based mainly on the fact that I was driven to pick up the book whenever I could. Whether I liked the writer/writing style/choices or not, I continually wanted to read it. And, the book is not just about the main event; it gives great insight into psychology, law, relationships and life.
Thanks for the review. I enjoy reading these types of stories, and you are right...sometimes the author seems to grovel in self-pity. I also can't read memoirs where the author blames the parents for everything. I tried to read one about a bulimic girl, and all she did was blame everything on her parents. I had to stop reading it at chapter 3, I was so angry with her. :)
ReplyDeleteMissy ~ I wonder how an author that tells their story avoids self-pity when their life has been filled with this or that abuse. Maybe it's writing it in third person or sharing more of their childhood instead of the adult mistakes. I really don't know.
ReplyDeleteThat's another thing about this book - there's a lot to discuss. I wrote more than I normally do and still had thoughts left over and questions to ask.
I have troubles with these types of memoirs--it was so refreshing to read The Glass Castle last week and not get that "woe is me" feeling--hard luck, yes, but hopeful. Regardless, it does sound like an interesting book.
ReplyDeleteTrish ~ The Glass Castle was an incredibly interesting book. I still have your post saved in Google Reader, so I'll be by sometime to comment. :) Life is making it difficult to get to blogs right now.
ReplyDeleteWell, hard to actually convey to you all, what I think, though, what
ReplyDeleteMelanie "Told" her cousin Eddie Z'L, towards the end of the book, sums it up, "Its not written that well and who would want to read it", is, about the ONLY "Truth" I found here..... Funny, how two people can go through the same experience, but come away with completely different recollections of those events. I realize, that the book is about Melanie, but since Im the real-life "Scott", I thought I had to clarify a few things. Melanies memories of the events and at least, my role and cast, of the four years that I was with her, at a very crucial time in her life, were disingenuous, distorted, and filled with outright lies. So, if someone that, was that close to her, is
portrayed as I was, how "Honest, courageous and unvarnished", was the rest of her account??!! I am mentioned, numerous times throughout the book, but, portrayed, at best, as, a " Burly gang member, that sold drugs, was violent towards women, screwed up his life, spiraled into depression, had no social life, was becoming paranoid about her
traitorous relationship with my ex, caused her to become so fearful, that she moved out of the house, was so desperate after she left, that I proposed to marry her, but when rebuffed, started stalking her and eventually had to be restrained by a police order and, even after moving to Canada, continued threatening...But now, were "Friends"!!LOL!!......,This is the BEST piece of Literary fiction, that I read in a long time..Talking about selective memory, timeline and utter
falsification of events, is, to put it mildly, outrageous! After
reading her memories of those years, what struck me most, besides, that it was "Everyone" elses "Fault" that led up to the event, was the character assassination of myself, and the fact, that she completely
ignored, disavowed and never acknowledged, my continued love and
support for her, how pivotal my boys were, in helping her, with her
rehabilitation and, the sad fact was, that she never really loved me, as I did her. Absolutely no mention of feelings, affinity, emotions or empathy, towards my sons or myself..And, I think, what got her into this mess from the beginning, still resounds till this day, her complete lack of compassion and shame, to see beyond her own selfish needs, which in turn, reflects in what she did and what she wrote and how she is, till this day..
Nice touch, using Eddie Z'L and their tragedy, to try to sell this
warped story...I could go on, but, whats done is done....Though,
finding out how many "Conquests" she had, was surprising....Actually
very sad...