THE LOST BOY

Author:  Greg Ruth

Genre:  Sci-Fi YA Graphic Novel, Standalone

Published:  2013

Personal Rating:  1/5 (Don't Bother)

Format:  Book

Yearly Count:  2

From Goodreads:

Some mysteries are too dangerous to ignore. . .

After Nate moves into his new house, he discovers an old tape recorder in his bedroom and is suddenly thrust into a dark mystery about a boy who went missing many years ago. Now, as strange creatures begin to track Nate, he must partner with Tabitha, a local sleuth, to find out what they want with him. But time is running out, because a powerful force is gathering strength in the woods at the edge of town, and before long Nate and Tabitha will be forced to confront a terrifying foe and uncover the truth about the Lost Boy.

This is not the genre for me! I'm sure there are many, many people who thoroughly would love this graphic novel. The artistry was terrific, but again -- just not for me.

Thoughts of Joy

THE BEAR

Author:  Claire Cameron

Genre:  Fiction, Standalone

Published:  2014

Personal Rating:  1/5 (don't bother)

Format/Narrator:  Audiobook/
Cassandra Morris

Yearly Count:  44

Five-year-old Anna takes charge of her 3-year-old brother after a black bear attack of their parents.

UGH.  This was absolutely horrible.  I only continued to listen, because I was in the middle of multi-tasking and just left it running.  Otherwise, this would be a DNF along with a toss across the room.  UGH.  Unless you like unrealistic, continual bathroom talk and 5-year-old ridiculous narration . . . don't bother.

Thoughts of Joy

      

GIFT FROM THE SEA

Author:  Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Genre:  Non-Fiction, Standalone

Published:  1955

Personal Rating:  1/5 (don't bother)

Format/Narrator:  Audiobook/
Claudette Colbert

Yearly Count:  56

Here lies a bunch of rambling words trying to make connections between life and sea shells. 

I seriously must have a different book from everybody else.  This did absolutely nothing for me.  It didn't touch me, talk to me or even breeze by me.  I'm bewildered.

Thoughts of Joy

SLADE HOUSE

Author:  David Mitchell

Genre:  Paranormal Mystery (?), Standalone

Published:  2015

Personal Rating:  1/5 (Don't Bother)

Format/Narrator:  Audiobook/
Judd & Rodrigues

Yearly Count:  37

From Amazon:

Keep your eyes peeled for a small black iron door.

Down the road from a working-class British pub, along the brick wall of a narrow alley, if the conditions are exactly right, you’ll find the entrance to Slade House. A stranger will greet you by name and invite you inside. At first, you won’t want to leave. Later, you’ll find that you can’t. Every nine years, the house’s residents—an odd brother and sister—extend a unique invitation to someone who’s different or lonely: a precocious teenager, a recently divorced policeman, a shy college student. But what really goes on inside Slade House? For those who find out, it’s already too late. . . .

Spanning five decades, from the last days of the 1970s to the present, leaping genres, and barreling toward an astonishing conclusion, this intricately woven novel will pull you into a reality-warping new vision of the haunted house story—as only David Mitchell could imagine it.

W. E. I. R. D.

Thoughts of Joy

My thanks go to Random House & NetGalley for providing me with the eGalley.

THE PRIVATE EYE (Deluxe Edition)

Author:  Brian K. Vaughan

Genre:  Graphic Mystery, Standalone

Published:  2015

Personal Rating:  1.5/5 (ugh)
Format:  eBook

From NetGalley:

THE PRIVATE EYE is an eerily prescient sci-fi mystery about an unlicensed private investigator who stumbles onto the most important case of his life. The series is set in 2076, a time after "the cloud has burst", revealing everyone's secrets. As a result, there is no more Internet, and people are excessively guarded about their identity, to the point of appearing only masked in public.

I thought the description was intriguing, but by the time I reached 1/2 way, I disconnected.  Apparently, it is a rather loved comic.  It just didn't work for this reader.

Thoughts of Joy

My thanks go to Diamond Book Distributors and NetGalley for providing me with this eGalley.

SWERVE

Author:  Vicki Pettersson

Genre:  Horror, Standalone

Published:  2015

Personal Rating:  1/5 (don't bother)

Format:  eBook

Yearly Count:  46

From NetGalley:

It’s high summer in the Mojave Desert, and Kristine Rush and her fiancé, Daniel, are en route from Las Vegas to Lake Arrowhead, California, for the July Fourth holiday weekend. But when Daniel is abducted from a desolate rest stop, Kristine is forced to choose: return home unharmed, but never to see her fiancé again, or plunge forward into the searing desert to find him…where a killer lies in wait.

One road. One woman. One killer.

Sprinting against the clock, and uncertain if danger lies ahead or behind, Kristine must blaze an epic path through the gaudy flash of roadside casinos, abandoned highway stops, and a landscape rife with horrors never before imagined. Desperate to save her doomed husband-to-be, Kristine must summon long forgotten resources if she’s to go head-to-head against this unpredictable killer. And she’d better hurry. Because she only has twenty-four hours…to make one hell of a trip.

This book is billed as a psychological thriller.  HA!  It is a terrible horror novel.  Had I known, I would not have even picked it up.  I should have shut it down right from the start, but kept hoping for the best.  The amount of ambiguous violence against man and beast was despicable.  The writing was sophomoric and hit me the wrong way at every turn.  The whole plot was ridiculous and filled with crudeness.  This one was definitely not for me.  :(

Thoughts of Joy

  

My thanks go to Gallery Books and NetGalley for providing me with this eGalley.

AIRPLANE RIDES

Author:  Jake Alexander

Genre:  Non-Fiction, Standalone

Published:  2015

Personal Rating:  1.5/5 (ugh)

Format:  eBook

Yearly Count:  32

From NetGalley:

10 true conversations, anonymously conveyed by airline passengers to the author. Written under the pseudonym Jake Alexander, Airplane Rides follows a highly successful, but emotionally isolated, real life finance executive through actual conversations had with seatmates. The work takes place over a ten year period and is multidimensional across both the passenger stories told and the moral evolution of this modern day nomad who serves as our narrator. It is a unique set of social observations, provocatively unfolded through the often painful lessons learned by others. Airplane Rides captures that seductive state between where we have been, and where we are going and the possibility of finding absolution along the way.

There's not much to say about this one other than I did NOT like the narrator (aka: the author), which translates into I did NOT like the book.  On a positive note, I thought 2 of the 10 stories were decent (saved it from being a DNF), but overall, the writing was lacking and the author was too!

Thoughts of Joy

My thanks go to AuthorBuzz and NetGalley for providing me with this eGalley.

THE RUINS

Author:  Scott Smith

Genre:  Sci-Fi, Standalone

Published:  2006

Personal Rating:  1.5/5 (Ugh!)

Format/Narrator:  Audiobook/Patrick Wilson

Yearly Count:  25

A group of college kids go to Cancun for a party-filled vacation when the brother of a group member doesn't return from a mini-excursion.  They go looking for him in the jungle.

To quote the book, "... astoundingly stupid ..."  To reduce it to a one word from me, "ABSURD."

Thoughts of Joy

WIFE 22

Author:  Melanie Gideon

Genre:  Fiction, Standalone

Published:  2012

Personal Rating:  1.5/5 (UGH!)

Format/Narrator:  Audiobook/

Cassandra Campbell

Yearly Count:  4

Alice, a 40-year-old wife and mother of 2, signs up to do a marriage survey, and it changes her life.

R . I . D . I . C . U . L . O . U . S

(and that's being nice)

The worst thing about finishing this book was everything I thought regarding the storyline came true, and it made me angry!  It wouldn't be so lame and go there, I thought . . . I was wrong.  TRITE would be another appropriate word!  I wasted my time and emotion (anger - which I don't like feeling) on this book, but I'm over it now.  No more wasted thoughts.  Done.

THE TIME KEEPER

Author:  Mitch Albom

Genre:  Sci-Fi, Standalone

Published:  2012

Personal Rating:  1.5/5 (ugh)

Format/Narrator:  Audiobook/Dan Stevens

Yearly Count:  105

From Amazon:

(All you would have gotten from me was, "It's the story of Father Time.")

The inventor of the world's first clock is punished for trying to measure God's greatest gift. He is banished to a cave for centuries and forced to listen to the voices of all who come after him seeking more days, more years. Eventually, with his soul nearly broken, Father Time is granted his freedom, along with a magical hourglass and a mission: a chance to redeem himself by teaching two earthly people the true meaning of time.

He returns to our world--now dominated by the hour-counting he so innocently began--and commences a journey with two unlikely partners: one a teenage girl who is about to give up on life, the other a wealthy old businessman who wants to live forever. To save himself, he must save them both. And stop the world to do so.

I was at the library the day after I saw this book being mentioned on Dr. Phil and happened to run across it.  Being that it was only 4 CDs, I decided I would give it a try while doing some housework.  Unfortunately that's all it did - assist me in my housework.  I wasn't even taken by the message.  Boo.

WILLOW

Author:  Julia Hoban

Genre:  YA Fiction, Standalone

Published:  2010

Personal Rating:  1.75/5 (ugh +)

Format/Narrator:  Audiobook/Kim J. Ulrich

Yearly Count:  101

Willow, a 16-year-old, is the driver of a tragic accident that kills both of her parents. This story is how Willow deals with the emotions of the aftermath.

Unfortunately, I don't have anything positive to say about this book.  This was actually my second attempt at listening to it, and I probably should have just given up like I did the first time.  Most of the book was lackluster and even though I have not been exposed to this exact world, I found it to be extremely unrealistic in some scenarios.  Others had me guffawing and shaking my head, they were so ridiculous.  Maybe listening to it played a part in my dislike, but this one was simply not for me.  :(

THE KNIFE OF NEVER LETTING GO

Author: Patrick Ness

Genre: YA Sci-Fi Thriller, Series #1

Published: 2008

Personal Rating: 1.5/5 (better than don't bother)

Yearly Count: 17

Twelve-year-old Todd Hewitt lives on a planet where there are no women and all thoughts (called Noise) can be heard by all men and animals. Todd runs across a hole in the Noise and begins his discovery of chaos.

Ugh. I can't believe I finished this book. I didn't finish because I wanted to know what was going to happen, but because I realized I was quickly well over 100 pages (YA fast read) and decided I wanted to count the book. Yep - that's the real reason. Unfortunately, I should have followed my instincts when I read the very first sentence. Oi ya yoi ya yoi.

The only good thing about the book was that it had a sense of adventure. That's it. That's why it got a 1.5 instead of a 1. The entire book was filled with violence and swearing and negativity. I will not be reading any further in the series. It is simply: Not. For. Me.

(in search of a 2010 best read)

COMFORT & JOY

Author: Kristin Hannah

Genre: Fiction, Standalone

Published: 2005

Personal Rating: 1.5/5 (ugh)

Yearly Count: 141

Joy is newly divorced and has a heavy heart regarding the circumstances. She decides she needs to get away and start over. Joy's travel plans take a dive. She finds herself in a plane crash and then discovers her life.

Hokey, hokey, hokey. This was so not a book for me. Why did I continue? It was an audiobook, and I was on the road - only reason. Often I found myself dizzy, due to the continual eye-rolling. Ugh. I was warned and didn't take the warning seriously enough. My bad.

THE GARGOYLE

Author: Andrew Davidson

Genre: Fiction, Standalone

Published: 2008

Personal Rating: 1.5/5 (ugh)

Yearly Count: 113

An unnamed man survives a terrible car accident; however, he is left with a body that is burned beyond recognition. During the excruciating pain, and while his thoughts are not revolving around thankfulness, a schizophrenic woman named Marianne Engel appears at his bedside. She claims that they knew each other during medieval times and proceeds to tell him stories of those times.

Oh boy. I didn't follow my gut instinct to discontinue listening to this book and suffered through most of 16 CDs. It would have been so much better to release the book and give it a DNF rating. What was I thinking?! I was thinking that the modern times story was very interesting; well, the burns component was interesting. I didn't care for the occupation of the unnamed narrator, but thought that would pass. Once the medieval stories began I was hoping they would quickly pass, too. They did not - they actually overwhelmed the present day. By the end, I didn't even care much for the present day. Wasted: 19.5 hours of listening time. Lesson: Listen to your gut.

THE PENELOPIAD

Author:  Margaret Atwood

Genre:  Mythology

Published:  2005

Personal Rating:  1.5/5

Yearly Count:  108

  

The Penelopiad is the retelling of The Odyssey (Homer) from Penelope's perspective.  In the Odyssey, Penelope is Odysseus's wife and her cousin is Helen of Troy.  Odysseus goes off to war for twenty years, then comes back and kills Penelope's 12 maids and suitors.

Blah.  I went on a short road trip and thought this would be perfect (3 CDs).  It was perfect - in length, but flawed in story.  I like retellings from another character's perspective; however, I do not like mythology at all and this did not convince me otherwise.

THE GATHERING

Anne Enright

Genre: Fiction

Published: 2007

Personal Rating: 1/5

Yearly Count: 38

Told from the middle child's perspective, the Hegarty family gather together for a loved one's funeral. Memories, future thoughts, today, dreams, truth, hallucinations - all jumbled up together - what a mess!

If it weren't for the fact that I received this book from the kind-hearted Gentle Reader of Shelf Life and that it is a Man Booker Challenge AND Notable Books Challenge choice, I would have abandoned it from the get-go.

By the Decades Challenge ~ 00's (1902)

HEART OF DARKNESS

Joseph Conrad

Personal Rating: 1.5/5

Yearly Count: 59

This book satisfies the 1900's for the Decade Challenge ... and that's about all. Ugh! Okay, there are two things that I liked about this book: 1. the word choice (excellent diction) and 2. it was a novella (short read!). Done.

NYT Notable Book Challenge

EVERYMAN

Philip Roth ~ BOiPod

Personal Rating: 1.5/5

Yearly Count: 39

If you like to read or listen to someone complaining about aches and pains, medications, surgery, sickness, infidelity, divorces, estranged relationships, and death - this one is for you. It was NOT for me!

LITTLE CHILDREN
Tom Perrotta ~ BOiPod
Personal Rating: 1/5
Yearly Count: 20



UGH! A more appropriate title would be PATHETIC PARENTS.

I've really got to start reading dust jackets and reviews before I pick up a book. I would have never listened to this one had I just an inkling of how awful it was going to be. The entire plot revolved around unhappy adults and how they seek out some kind of happiness...all at the expense of others.

I also have to start ditching books that sicken me. At best, it reminded me of the worst soap opera I could imagine with much more trashy s*x thrown in. I give it a "1", instead of a "0", because the man can write; it's what he wrote about that caused me problems.

My advice...don't even give it a second thought.

Classics Challenge #5/5 & By the Decades Challenge ~ 20's (1925)

MRS. DALLOWAY
Virginia Woolf
Personal Rating: 1/5
Yearly Count: 7



Unbearably boring! And...I'm not going to bore anybody else with my ramblings of remorse for reading it to its end.